A ONE-STOP LOVER

If you’ve just met someone and started dating, it’s sheer folly to begin making all sorts of demands, whether you’re male or female.

A romantic relationship is not the same as adopting a child. It should be a partnership where two adults, who already have their own lives, come together to add value to each other—not to plot what they can take from one another. Such a relationship would neither be healthy nor fulfilling.

Suppose you don’t yet have a personal means of livelihood. In that case, your priority should be to step out, roll up your sleeves, and find legitimate work to cover your expenses—at least as a starting point—before seeking a relationship. Otherwise, you risk exhausting your partner with constant needs and demands.

Alternatively, if the person you’re dating, in a relationship with or married, runs their own business, find ways to contribute meaningfully to their endeavours. Intentionally seek ways to add value to their business or dreams. By doing this, even if you’re not directly giving them money, you’re showing genuine support. It’s a major turn-off to enter a relationship or marriage empty-handed with plans to be dependent on your partner. When you actively contribute to someone’s aspirations, they’ll naturally want to give back to you and make sacrifices for your sake. Such mutual support fosters a continuous flow of goodwill and generosity.

Gentlemen, don’t meet a lady in the first week of dating and immediately start asking her to bring food when she visits you. Ladies don’t meet a man and immediately start asking him for money to do your hair, solve your siblings’ issues, or pay your rent—especially if he’s still struggling to pay his own.

Certain things should neither be forced, rushed, nor demanded. They should evolve naturally as the relationship grows and deepens.

As we step into the new year, 2025, make a conscious decision to show your partner valuable love. When you provide value that they cannot easily find elsewhere, you become truly indispensable.

Be a one-stop lover.

Feel me?

Sharoneez Emephia