Me and My Big Mouth!

We live in a rapidly changing world where courtesy, good manners, and decorum are fast disappearing from the lives of many people, and their opposites are quickly becoming the norm.

It was not always this way. I was raised to understand that respect is an essential part of interpersonal relationships, that respect is reciprocal, and that treating others with decency is not optional. Speaking in loud, harsh tones, for instance, was once seen as a sign of poor upbringing and was not commonplace. In fact, within the environment in which I grew up, witnessing people openly disrespecting themselves—let alone being rude to elders or spreading falsehoods about others—was cause for concern. However, in today’s world, these behaviours and more have regrettably become widely accepted.

Cancel culture, the deliberate dissemination of false and unverifiable information about others, and the outright defamation of people’s characters have insidiously become part of our reality. How unfortunate this is.

In case you have not realised, the first person affected by your negative and reckless words is you, the speaker. Next is the listener, and finally, the individual being spoken about. Why would anyone sit down and fabricate lies or spread unverified information about another person?

If you are in the habit of doing this, it is in your best interest to understand that many individuals are no longer sweeping issues of character defamation under the carpet or allowing them to go unchallenged—for very obvious reasons.

The primary reason is that, in this era of rapid technological advancement, the internet never forgets. Any false or negative information posted about someone on social media can resurface time and again. Nowadays, individuals of questionable character go beyond face-to-face confrontations; they recklessly take to the internet to spread unverifiable claims about people they have never even met. This is a most undignified and reprehensible way to live.

If you have engaged in such behaviour, you should be aware that there is now a greater awareness of the law than ever before. Many aggrieved individuals are taking advantage of this growing knowledge of fundamental human rights to pursue legal action for defamation.

If you lack credible information about a person or a subject, it is far safer to remain silent than to risk being dragged to court. Furthermore, even if you have had the privilege of being close to someone and gained access to private information about them, revealing such details in public—especially due to a disagreement—is a glaring sign of immaturity and cruelty.

We must learn to be slow to speak, especially on sensitive matters that could irreparably damage a person’s reputation. With today’s technology and the speed at which information, particularly negative narratives, spreads, the consequences of reckless speech can be dire.

There is a reason why the scriptures advise us to be slow to speak and remind us that even a foolish person is deemed wise when they remain silent.

If you wish to live long and enjoy a good life, restrain your tongue from speaking evil and your mouth from uttering deceit. You do not need to have an opinion on everything and everyone.

Until I come your way again on this platform, make a conscious effort to speak less—even when you know a great deal—if only to protect yourself from unnecessary trouble, legal battles, and public disgrace. It would not be a pleasant experience.

Sharoneez Emephia