Should I give him my money?

As a single woman, should I give the man I’m dating my money? Is it wise, as a married woman, to give my husband my money?

Let me begin with a statement I heard a long time ago: “You can give without loving, but you cannot truly love someone without wanting to give to them—and actually giving to them.”

That said, I would like to explain to single women that giving money to a man you are not married to over a prolonged period can complicate your relationship. This is because real men are naturally designed by God to be providers and protectors. As human beings, we tend to resist anything that disrupts our fundamental nature. So, if the man you are dating is not a taker or a user—if he is mature, responsible, and principled—he may become uncomfortable with you continually giving him money. Even if his love for you is genuine, he may start questioning his own feelings, wondering whether you are trying to buy his affection or manipulate him. To some single men, such continuous giving might even come across as desperation.

That being said, there are always exceptions to every rule. It is important to understand the person you are with and do what works for your particular relationship, as one approach does not fit all. If the man you are dating has consistently shown responsibility and is merely going through a temporary financial challenge, offering support during that period may not be inappropriate. After all, a healthy relationship should be a place of mutual support, rather than one party doing all the giving and sacrificing.

However, giving a man money is not the only way to support him when he is facing financial difficulties. You could help him by offering fresh and lucrative ideas, introducing him to useful contacts, or encouraging his professional growth in ways that align with his skills. The key is maintaining balance at all times, guided by wisdom and intuition.

Interestingly, I have heard many married women say they will never again give their husbands money or contribute to household expenses. Their reason? They discovered their husbands were having extramarital affairs, and they believe that continuing to share their money would only empower these men financially to sustain their infidelities. This is a complex and deeply emotional issue.

Nevertheless, I would encourage married couples to take joint ownership of their marriages and remain committed to each other. When both partners are dedicated to the success of their relationship, things tend to run more smoothly within the family. The responsibility of paying bills in a marriage should not be based on gender alone but rather on mutual understanding and shared commitment.

Let wisdom guide our interactions with our partners and spouses. Open and honest communication about financial matters and business challenges will help partners understand how to offer effective support. Again, balance is the key.

Every healthy relationship should embody these three Ps:

PRAY together

PAY together

PLAY together

Do you agree?

By Sharoneez Emephia