Boo-boo, What are you hiding?

How do you expect your partner or spouse to remain loyal and committed to you when your eyes blaze with suspicion every time they come near your phone? You carry it everywhere—even into the bathroom—just to ensure they have no clue who you’re talking to or what your conversations entail.

This is one of the quickest ways to create emotional distance in your relationship. As a defence mechanism, your partner may start withdrawing, protecting their heart from potential hurt. Worse still, they might begin making alternative plans for their love life because, whether you admit it or not, it is evident you are hiding something.

It is both ironic and paradoxical to call someone your life partner or spouse—you may even have children together—yet maintain such secrecy while still expecting genuine intimacy.

A true life partnership is for mature adults who are ready and willing to share every aspect of their lives with the person they have chosen. Real intimacy in a loving relationship goes beyond physical closeness or having children together; it involves granting your partner unrestricted access to your deepest thoughts, dreams, and plans. It means being vulnerable with them without fear or shame.

If you prefer to live a secretive, ‘password-protected’ life even with the person meant to be closest to you, wouldn’t it make more sense to remain single so you can enjoy your solitude without interference?

In this digital age, so much of people’s lives is stored on their phones. You can learn more about a person in a single day by accessing their phone than you might in years of being physically around them. This is why I deeply respect the rare couples who have nothing to hide from each other and grant free access to their phones. It’s not about being intrusive or nosy; it’s about honesty, maturity, and transparency with the person you have chosen to share your life and personal space with.

People with nothing to conceal from their partners do not password-protect every aspect of their lives.

Does your partner remain glued to their phone at all times, even while taking a bath? Do they react with panic or aggression if you accidentally come near their phone—even when you’re merely helping them charge it? If so, perhaps it’s time to ask them what they’re hiding before it’s too late… Do you feel me?

Sharoneez Emephia