The dilemma of the Goldsmith’s Child

By Sharoneez Emephia

I am one of those who firmly believe that charity and love should truly begin at home.

I subscribe to the school of thought that those closest to me, my family and immediate circle, should benefit first from the blessings in my life. Only then should those blessings extend to others: neighbours, community, and eventually, the wider world.

I was raised with the understanding that one must treat oneself with kindness and care. For example, I use the finest dishes from my collection when serving my meals. I never serve a guest a choice delicacy that I have not first tasted myself. This may seem strange to some, especially those who reserve the best of what they’ve worked hard for exclusively for others. That’s why I find it difficult to understand why, for instance, a father would prefer to spend the majority of his income or wealth on strangers, while his immediate family lacks even the basics, sometimes to the point of starvation. That, to me, is a deeply flawed and disorganised way of life.

I once heard the story of a certain goldsmith’s child. Each time the child saw his father refining gold for others, he would plead with him to make something special for him too. But the father, a master goldsmith, would respond, “Be patient. When I make yours, it shall be the finest gold ever crafted.” The child believed him. And so he waited, day after day, year after year, convinced that one day, his father would finally make a piece of gold just for him.

That day never came.

Eventually, the father told his son, “The gold is finished.” And with that, the child, despite being the son of a goldsmith, ended up with no gold to his name.

That story left a lasting impression on me. I vowed never to suffer the same fate as the goldsmith’s child.

I firmly believe that charity must begin at home. Members of one’s household should enjoy the prime benefits of the family’s blessings before anything is given away to outsiders. If you employ staff, ensure they are among the first beneficiaries of your business’s success. It is both abnormal and unjust for the people doing the hardest work to be the ones receiving the least reward. That is not just poor management, it is an upside-down system.

Furthermore, if you organise events or programmes, make it a rule that every member of the organising team receives the best of what is available, not the leftovers. If they are unable to partake immediately due to their responsibilities, their preferred portions should be reserved for them and presented once their duties are complete.

I never want to live the life of the goldsmith’s child. Whether at home or in the workplace, I ensure that no guest receives anything better than what I would give myself. I love myself enough to maintain that principle.

So I encourage you: learn to love and prioritise yourself. Do not wait for someone else to acknowledge your worth. Give yourself the best, because you deserve it.

Never, ever suffer the dilemma of the goldsmith’s child.